Issue link: https://imageup.uberflip.com/i/1239387
32 | OHCC LIVING | MAY 2020 | Hello everyone. We have absolutely nothing to report this month. Seems golf people have an adversity to playing when bad viruses are attacking them. Can't possibly understand that. No holes in one. No tournaments. Nobody to make fun of. Bummer this month. I did read almost every golf joke known to mankind, but just could not come up with a lot that were funny enough to use up my four to five hundred words. But here are a couple of laughers. So, these golfers are playing a round, and suddenly a naked streaker runs across the fairway disturbing their concentration. Right behind him are three guys in white coats with one lagging behind carrying two buckets of sand? One of the foursome grabs the second guy and asks what the heck is going on, and is told that the naked person is from the Asylum and is always trying to escape. We, therefore, have to catch him and there is a bonus for the person who does. The golfer thinks about this and then asks what is with the other guy carrying the two buckets of sand. Oh, that, sure, it is because he caught the streaker last time and it's his handicap. OK, fine… one more joke and that is it. The National Science Foundation just concluded its two-year study and announced its results of the American recreational preferences. The sport of choice for Americans are categorized. Unemployed or incarcerated: Soccer; Maintenance and fast food workers: Bowling; Blue Collar: Football; Supervisor: Baseball; Middle management: Tennis; and Corporate officer: Golf. The conclusion arrived at was that "The higher your rise up the corporate ladder, the smaller the balls you play with become?" That's it for the jokes. Back to important issues. We have decided it is time for YOU to help re-energize the economy after we crush the virus by buying a new golf cart, so we have included a couple of pictures of the latest models for your perusal. Buy one and give it to your son or daughter and another to replace that out of date, ugly one, you are now driving. That'll get the economy going. C-ya next month. Hal Stephens at bbopalua@yahoo.com PS: This has absolutely nothing to do with golf. The Mallards are back! Beyond the chain at the bottom of our park, off Arcadia Way, look down where the run off comes out of OHCC and you should see them. The dad showed up about a week ago, but I didn't see the mom for six days. Thought she had died. But, there she was this morning. I guess they will be building another nest like they have for the last five years. Golf Club Just in case: Check with your club contact to confirm meeting place, date, and time.