Image Up Advertising & Design

FOUR SEASONS BREEZE | APRIL 2021 27 THERE'S AN APP FOR THAT! By Steve Benoff Clueless in Beaumont. That would be me. [A note to grammarians: I spent some time on this little sentence. I know that a strict grammarian would use "I" instead of "me." I remember the predicate nominative. But after some research, I've decided that "me" is not only the vastly more commonly-used noun in this sentence, it is perfectly acceptable in all forms of writing and speaking.] I received an email from Four Seasoner Ron Alsop. (What? Seasoner is not a word? If I say Four Seasons owner or resident that sounds so cold and unfriendly, especially for someone who says he enjoys my articles. So, I'm going with Seasoner.) Ron sent me an email asking me about "FB removal." Silly me, I had no idea what he was talking about. So, I googled (don't you think that's now an accepted lowercase verb?) "FB removal." This is what came up – "An embedded foreign body can be removed by using a gentle flicking motion with an eye spud." While I did have two eye surgeries as a child and recently had double cataract surgeries, I don't think I'm qualified on that subject. Nor do I think that's what Ron was asking. FB, FB, what could that stand for? I asked Ron, and he replied Facebook dummy. Actually, he didn't say dummy, but that might well apply. Only a clueless person these days would not instantly know what Ron meant by FB. Now, I can't say I've never been on Facebook. When the pandemic started, and I called the local Fantastic Sam's for information on their status, I got a recording saying to check their Facebook page. So, I joined Facebook for that single purpose. Lo and behold, their page gave me no information. (They have since closed that store completely.) Not having any other interest in Facebook, I closed my account. (I know that many of you love Facebook, I'm just not among you.) So, Ron, removing Facebook is a two-step process. First you close your account. My guess is that's much easier on your computer than on the app on your smartphone. I can't remember, but I imagine that process starts by going to your account settings and finding the option to close it. That probably involves several clicks so they know that's really what you want to do. Judging from my own experience, once you've completed that task, you won't be hounded with emails to reverse your decision as I was when I closed my Netflix account. The second step is to remove the Facebook app from your phone. On an iPhone, press and hold the app icon, select Remove App, select Delete App, select Delete. Your app and associated data stored on your phone are gone. It can't be too different on an Android phone. The fact of the matter is that though I have over a hundred apps on my phone, none of them is a social media app. [Another note to grammarians: I'm not ready to adopt "none are." "None" is a contraction of "not one." So, I'm sticking with the singular.] Not Facebook, not Instagram, not even Twitter. They don't interest me, but I'm sure they interest many of you. That's the great thing about apps. The Apple App Store has almost two million of them, and the Google Play Store has half again as many. Some you have to pay for; many are free. So, go to the app store on your smartphone and type in any subject that interests you, and I'm sure something will pop up. I just took my own advice and got a disappointing result. I have a lousy memory. I almost didn't go to law school because I was afraid my poor memory would keep me from passing the bar. (Luckily, I did on my first try.) I'm fascinated by trees, but I can hardly identify one by name. Years ago, I downloaded an app to help me identify trees and plants, but it didn't really work for me. I figured by now there must be an app that will identify any tree or plant you frame with the camera on your phone. So, I entered "trees" in the app search bar and found one that did just that. I downloaded it and gave it a try. I tried it out on a bush in the front on my house, and it gave me a result. Unfortunately, the app misidentified it. I tried it on the same type of bush in the backyard. I got a different result this time. But again, the answer was wrong. So, I gave up and deleted the app. Maybe next time. I've made my feelings about social media pretty clear. But I realize I'm in the minority. I'd like to hear from you about your positive views on the subject. If I get enough of a response, I'll write a column on it. Understand, that if you do email me, you're agreeing to having your name used in the piece. If you use an app you'd like to share with others, let me know at steve.benoff@verizon.net. Removing Yourself from FB

• Cover