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6 OUR YUCAIPA | DECEMBER 2015 The Middle of the Road: By Randy Peters, a middle-aged, middle-income, middle-school teacher Eating Out is an Adventure in Yucaipa Going out to eat has become a way of life for me lately. Between meetings, family changes, and long days of work, it just makes sense. After a long day at work, the last thing my wife and I feel like doing is making a full and healthy dinner at home. The preparation time to make a good meal for two does not seem to be any less than making the meals when the kids still lived at home. And the kids aren't here to clear the table and do the dishes. Several Yucaipa restaurants have provided some stories and memories during this past month. Eating at Hickory Ranch is a constant reminder that my wife and I are now 'old-time' Yucaipa residents. Yes, we actually have a table at Hickory Ranch that we prefer. Victor knows that I prefer the ice tea and prime rib and my wife will always order broccoli-only as her side dish. If owner Helen is on site, she will come over and hug my wife and talk about her daughters and grandkids since my wife taught her daughters when they were 8 years old. For a change of pace, we will visit other Yucaipa restaurants as well. Las Fuentes has become a favorite. I usually get the Mexican Chicken Caesar Salad when I'm trying to be wise and healthy. Other times I'll order the sampler plate – carbs be damned! Besides the food, the people working there are some of the friendliest people around. And they can sing! Every once in a while you will hear the guys serenade the food as they prepare it and bring it to your table. Speaking of having fun and singing at inappropriate times, Las Fuentes makes a great healthy margarita using fresh juices and no salt. You would think with all the healthy choices there, my numbers would be getting better. When American Road Trip first opened, I added to my bucket list. I was going to eat through the many, many hamburgers they had on their menu. They had hamburger recipes to reflect many states and regions across the country. The menu has changed, but they still have one of the best hamburgers on any menu in town. I cut it up and eat it with a fork. Otherwise, I've found that I can't eat it like a typical sandwich because it falls apart in my hands and will decorate my shirt in ways that just aren't attractive. A couple of weeks ago, my wife and I went to the Road Trip for an early dinner. We thought that it would be relaxing and quiet. No, we didn't go at 3:30; we aren't THAT old yet! My wife and I tend to watch the people around us. Because we often see many current and former students and their families, we are always on the watch to know who is in the room and who can hear our conversation. People don't always welcome the idea that teachers sometimes talk about non-teaching topics! We were seated at a table near the door. There was a small group of people at the next table. With them was a young man about 18 or 19 years old. With him appeared to be a set of parents, a younger brother, and a couple more people in their early twenties. We didn't mean to eavesdrop, but we couldn't help it. The young man seemed very impressed with himself and his college life. He spoke of it loudly… very loudly. It was as if he were joining us at our table. His guests seemed very impressed which seemed to encourage him to further narrate his exploits, explain the menu choices, discuss the food at college, explain why his roommates don't always come home every night, and the faults of the electoral college. His ranting overtook the quiet conversation my wife and I were trying to have. After a while we just laughed and enjoyed the show. In fact, because of life lessons explained by the first-year college student sitting to the west, we didn't pay too much attention to the family now seated to the east. My first thought when I heard them was that the Duggars left their home in Arkansas and came to Yucaipa. Cries of "Can you read the menu to me?" "I want pizza!" "Where's the lady with my water?" "This is a better table than the other one!" "Why is there a TV over there?" "Did you hear that I wanted pizza?" "Do you care if I get steak?" It sounded like a bus of children had just invaded. So I did my slow, polite turn expecting to see of dozens of rug rats, curtain crawlers, and knee biters. Instead, I saw a young couple with two children. One child was inserting one straw into the ends of others and waving it like a Jedi master. He continued his monologue, "Do you have any more straws?" "My napkin is on the floor. Should I leave it there?" "My tummy is making noises." The other, older child sat quietly staring at her phone and flipping through social media like a Kardashian. The parents gazed across the table at each other. Their hands locked together in the middle of the table, fingers intertwined. To most people, they looked like a couple on a romantic date. But a closer look at their hands revealed a different story. They were subtly changing their hands into fists, flat palms, and sticking out two fingers. Eventually her paper landed on his rock. He stood up, kissed his wife on the forehead, grabbed the younger child and walked outside to apparently answer all of his questions in private. I now fondly remember those days when the kids were young and still learning proper restaurant etiquette. I smiled, looked at my wife, and grabbed her hands across the table. As the college student's booming voice explained the reasons for his popularity, I tried to start a game of rock, paper, scissors. Perhaps one of us should take the young man outside! Restaurants in Yucaipa will continue to be a relaxing distraction for my wife and me, especially as family comes to town and the holidays approach. Enjoy the food and the people! Keep your eyes on the road!