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It's the beginning of a new year and you may be thinking "what am I waiting for?" I would really like to lose some weight or at least get healthier. TOPS is here at Four Seasons to help and we have a great group of men and women who will make you feel comfortable and provide encouragement to help you reach your goal. Actually, we have quite a few couples who have joined together which can be helpful as you are there to support each other. TOPS is also quite affordable with a yearly membership fee of $32 and $3 per month chapter dues. Our first meeting this month will be Feb. 2 and will be a rededication program at the Summit. This will be a great reminder for all of us about why we joined TOPS in the first place. Anyone may attend and, as always, there is no obligation to join at your first meeting. As I said this meeting will be at the Summit with weigh-in at 8:30 am and the program at 9 am. We will also have some healthy snacks. We generally meet each Tuesday in the Ballroom with weigh-in from 8-8:30 am and the meeting 8:30-9:30 am. For more information contact our chapter leader and Four Seasons resident, Cathy Calhoun at (951) 849-2614 or Rosalee Strong, TOPS Area Captain at (951) 845-9313. ~ Cheryl Burke 36 FOUR SEASONS BREEZE | FEBRUARY 2016 Jewish Social Club We welcome residents who want to connect to Judaism, its culture, and celebrations. Members enjoy social, cultural and religious get-togethers, connect to other organizations in-and-around the community, engage in exciting seasonal celebrations, and attend Lodge and private home settings to taste varieties of Far Eastern and Mediterranean foods and drinks, as well as attend festive holiday neg Shabbat (dessert). We plan outstanding, joyous celebrations of events around Thanksgiving, the Harvest Festival, Passover, Purim, and Hanukkah, the Festival of Lights. Members have attended movie nights, holiday celebrations, and committee meetings at private homes to plan events in Redlands and Sun Lakes, as well as meetings at our Lodge Card Room, on various occasions 6 to 8:30 pm. All are welcome. For more information about these events, and to be put on our email lists, please contact us at: chavurah.time@aol.com, or to talk to a real person, (714) 423-4755, Dr. Zee 'Rachel' Knapp or Lynn Matthews at (951) 845-7990. ~ Dr. Zee Knapp TOPS Grief is universal. Eventually, everyone will lose someone close to them, and they will experience grief. In many countries and in many cultural or ethnic groups, there are familiar rituals in place that help to process the grief and provide comfort. Unfortunately in this country, death is often looked upon as failure rather than as a part of life, and grief is something to "get through" as soon as possible. And after about six months of grieving, we are supposed to achieve closure. And then it's time to move on, to get back to the old life, to keep moving forward. I am frequently the grateful recipient of various articles about grief, about care taking, about death. Friends forward something they have found online or in a magazine or newspaper, as do current and past participants in the Bereavement Group. This week I received an article about the concept of closure, about that magical event that is supposed to happen at some appropriate time after the death of a loved one. I wish I could just copy the article here. It is written by a doctor at the City of Hope, who sees death frequently in his practice. His name is Stephen J. Forman and the subtitle of his article says, "As a cancer doctor, I see death — and see how the loss of a loved one is a part of each person's life forever." In his experience, as in mine, the wound caused by the loss of a cherished person will be a part of the survivor's life forever. The memory of the lost loved one will be evoked by a song, a smell, a sight, a place, or a date on the calendar. There is no closure, no finality that will put a stop to these events. And who would really want that, anyway? These memories occur because of the love we carry inside, because of the fullness of the relationship we once had. We talk about this frequently in our group. About how living our life to the fullest honors all that the person gave us and taught us. And how these poignant memories keep us connected to the lost loved one. It's not something to be shunned, or to be "gotten through." If you would like to learn more about the process of grief, about how it can enrich your life and touch you in heartfelt ways, come join us. We meet on Mondays in the Crafts Room at the Lodge, from 1 to 3 pm. We make the room private, and all conversation is confidential. You can just show up or you can speak with me first. My telephone number is (951) 922-0934 and my email is lauriemlarson425@ gmail.com. ~ Laurie Larson Bereavement Group

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