Issue link: https://imageup.uberflip.com/i/814407
SOLERA DIAMOND VALLEY | MAY 2017 9 By Theresa Rossetti, Resident Any guesses what I'll be complaining about this month? Religion? Politics? The lack of good chick-flicks coming out of Hollywood lately? Nope, none of those things. This month I feel the need to rant about one of my pet peeves. Something that has been clogging our supermarket aisles, our pantries and our arteries for the last few years. I am speaking of the mind-numbing options we are faced with when buying Oreos and M&Ms. Up until 2012, Oreos were pretty much just Oreos. Oh, there were Thin Oreos, Double Stuf and even Mega Stuf, but a case can be made that these were just variations on the same theme. Then something horrible happened. Oreos started popping up all over in strange, and usually horrible tasting, varieties. Just to name a few, there have been, or worse, continue to be: Banana Split Oreos, Neapolitan Oreos, Strawberry Milkshake Oreos (the horror of this cannot be understated), Swedish Fish Oreos, Blueberry Pie Oreos and - I'm sorry, I really cannot continue typing the others. On my own merits, none of these would ever have existed in my home. I am an Oreo purist. An Oreo and some milk are a classic for a reason. However, there is another human living in my home. He shops more than I do. I think you can guess where this is going. It wouldn't be so bad if he liked them, but he usually doesn't. That means an open package of Oreos exists in my home until I get around to dropping them off by the coffee pot in the Lodge to inflict these atrocities on unsuspecting fellow Solerans. I refuse to apologize. Better you than me. As I typed this, Cinnamon Bun Oreos arrived in the house. Expect to see them soon. Now, the issue with M&Ms. Regular and Peanut M&Ms have also been around for years. There is nothing wrong with either. They improve any movie you are watching. But, again, someone decided it would be a good idea ($$$$) to bring different flavors to the unsuspecting public. So now we have been subjected to: White Chocolate Carrot Cake M&Ms, Strawberried Peanut Butter M&Ms, Cherry Cordial M&Ms, Candy Corn M&Ms, Pumpkin Spice M&Ms, Birthday Cake M&Ms and (oh, the horror) Coconut M&Ms. Again, a lot of these have shown up in my home. And quickly left. The only one I miss is the Café Mocha that was available only at Target the end of 2015. Since I liked them, they are no longer available. Oreos and M&Ms aren't the only food products that have been subjected to this marketing madness, but they are the ones I've had to deal with. I'm sure you know of some other products that fit in this category. Now let's talk Flavored Vodkas. Please. Mix your vodka with Orange Juice, like a normal human being, and leave the Whipped Cream and Birthday Cake to whipped cream and birthday cakes! It's up to all of us to Stop the Madness! STOP THE MADNESS!