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38 FOUR SEASONS BREEZE | OCTOBER 2017 The Veteran's Club at Four Seasons was formed in September 2013. Our mission purpose was to recognize all the veterans living here at Four Seasons. To date we have more than 100 neighbors recognized as Veterans of the many wars our nation has endured. These veterans are recognized in our Honor Roll website, www.fourseasonsvets.org. Our club is unique. We do not have structured meetings, dues, or costs to be involved. Your Military Service to our country has you paid up for life. Veteran sign-ups are on Wednesdays, 12 pm near the Bistro. We will take your photo at the Wednesday interview meeting for inclusion in the "Honor Roll." Contact Irve Sturner if you will attend at irve@verizon.net or call (949) 422-9969. Our website is www.fourseasonsvets.org. ~ Irve Sturner Four Seasons Veterans Bereavement Group Grief is universal. Eventually, everyone will lose someone close to them, and they will experience grief. In many countries and in many cultural or ethnic groups, there are familiar rituals in place that help to process the grief and provide comfort. Unfortunately in this country, death is often looked upon as failure rather than as a part of life, and grief is something to "get through" as soon as possible. And after about six months of grieving, we are supposed to achieve closure. And then it's time to move on, to get back to the old life, to keep moving forward. I am frequently the grateful recipient of various articles about grief, about care-taking, about death. Friends forward something they have found online or in a magazine or newspaper, as do current and past participants in the Bereavement Group. Some time ago I received an article about the concept of closure, about that magical event that is supposed to happen at some appropriate time after the death of a loved one. I wish I could just copy the article here. It is written by a doctor at the City of Hope, who sees death frequently in his practice. His name is Stephen J. Forman and the subtitle of his article says, "As a cancer doctor, I see death — and see how the loss of a loved one is a part of each person's life forever." In his experience, as in mine, the wound caused by the loss of a cherished person will be a part of the survivor's life forever. The memory of the lost loved one will be evoked by a song, a smell, a sight, a place, or a date on the calendar. There is no closure, no finality that will put a stop to these events. And who would really want that, anyway? These memories occur because of the love we carry inside, because of the fullness of the relationship we once had. We talk about this frequently in our group. About how living our life to the fullest honors all that the person gave us and taught us. And how these poignant memories keep us connected to the lost loved one. It's not something to be shunned, or to be "gotten through." If you would like to learn more about the process of grief, about how it can enrich your life and touch you in heartfelt ways, come join us. We meet on Mondays in the Crafts Room at the Lodge, from 1 to 3 pm. We make the room private, and all conversation is confidential. You can just show up or you can speak with me first. My telephone number is (951) 922-0934 and my email is lauriemlarson425@gmail. com. ~ Laurie Larson We are an informal opportunity for our LGBT neighbors and any other residents who are interested in meeting with us, to keep up to date, meet new members and have a relaxing dinner together. We usually meet in alternate months on the fourth Thursday. We don't have a dinner planned for October. We gather at the atrium in the Lodge, then order any Smitty's food items that we want and weather permitting, sit on the patio (otherwise, we find a convenient area to enjoy our food and company). Feel free to bring your own adult beverage, if you desire, and appropriate glassware. Everyone is welcome. Any questions can be directed to Dale at (951) 797-0364. ~ Dale Beckes Rainbow Group